{"id":21642,"date":"2025-10-10T02:32:57","date_gmt":"2025-10-10T02:32:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/?p=21642"},"modified":"2025-10-10T02:32:57","modified_gmt":"2025-10-10T02:32:57","slug":"podcast-101-caring-for-parents-planning-for-the-future-with-beth-pinsker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/?p=21642","title":{"rendered":"Podcast 101: Caring for Parents, Planning for the Future with Beth Pinsker"},"content":{"rendered":"<div>\n<p>Beth Pinsker CFP\u00ae, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marketwatch.com\/author\/beth-pinsker?gaa_at=eafs&amp;gaa_n=ASWzDAieDMrALSXliEhOG0sSs1qpEz1kag4Ep6P9qhkHK2POk_YnbsIHgAoOg3b2uyg%3D&amp;gaa_ts=68e0211f&amp;gaa_sig=L3g3LdHMNT9M6zpQL3W20DrA3s6UulhlcVC-syiOhoxy1UzzWbQWf6wJSzTYM7Ujxfo6enCDgofq5R6fWxZ0vA%3D%3D\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">MarketWatch<\/a> columnist, and author of <a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/4mTKxyZ\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>My Mother\u2019s Money<\/em><\/a> explains how caring for her mom exposed the gap between \u201cknowing\u201d and \u201cdoing\u201d estate\/care plans. Only ~30% have wills; even fewer have POAs\/health proxies, creating real cash-flow and authorization crises when care starts. She describes the emotional and ethical knots (siblings, guilt) and how illiquid assets\/annuity rules and bank hurdles complicate paying caregivers. Takeaways: set POAs\/health proxies, add phone legacy contacts, name beneficiaries on all accounts\/titles to avoid probate, and use fee-only help when needed. Beth frames inheritances as \u201cBubby money\u201d spending aligned with a loved one\u2019s values and urges investing in health and lifestyle now.<\/p>\n<p>Watch the video on our <a href=\"https:\/\/youtu.be\/gO7gASWNPUY\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">YouTube Channel<\/a>:<\/p>\n<p>\n  <iframe title=\"Caring for Parents Planning for the Future with Beth Pinsker (ep.101)\" width=\"788\" height=\"443\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/gO7gASWNPUY?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><br \/>\n  <\/iframe>\n<\/p>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-listen-now\">Listen Now<\/h2>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/the-newretirement-podcast.simplecast.com\/episodes\/beth-pinsker\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Listen to the podcast on Simplecast<\/a> or right here:<\/p>\n<p>\n  <iframe height=\"200px\" width=\"80%\" frameborder=\"no\" scrolling=\"no\" seamless=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/player.simplecast.com\/d182a9ae-6112-4003-912c-3b890881c1ab?dark=false\" style=\"max-width: 800px; display: block; margin: 0 auto;\"><br \/>\n  <\/iframe>\n<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-callouts\">Callouts:<\/h3>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/lnk.to\/retireoften\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/bethpinsker.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Beth Pinsker Website<\/a>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Book: <a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/4mTKxyZ\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>My Mother\u2019s Money<\/em><\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.marketwatch.com\/author\/beth-pinsker?gaa_at=eafs&amp;gaa_n=ASWzDAieDMrALSXliEhOG0sSs1qpEz1kag4Ep6P9qhkHK2POk_YnbsIHgAoOg3b2uyg%3D&amp;gaa_ts=68e0211f&amp;gaa_sig=L3g3LdHMNT9M6zpQL3W20DrA3s6UulhlcVC-syiOhoxy1UzzWbQWf6wJSzTYM7Ujxfo6enCDgofq5R6fWxZ0vA%3D%3D\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>MarketWatch<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.naela.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/bethpinsker_ny\/#\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Instagram<\/a> | <a href=\"https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/in\/bpinsker\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">LinkedIn<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-transcription\">Transcription<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=0.18\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">00:00<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Welcome to Boldin Your Money. I\u2019m your host Steve Chen, and today I\u2019m excited to join Beth Pinsker. She is a certified financial planner and a columnist at <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marketwatch.com\/author\/beth-pinsker?gaa_at=eafs&amp;gaa_n=ASWzDAieDMrALSXliEhOG0sSs1qpEz1kag4Ep6P9qhkHK2POk_YnbsIHgAoOg3b2uyg%3D&amp;gaa_ts=68e0211f&amp;gaa_sig=L3g3LdHMNT9M6zpQL3W20DrA3s6UulhlcVC-syiOhoxy1UzzWbQWf6wJSzTYM7Ujxfo6enCDgofq5R6fWxZ0vA%3D%3D\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">MarketWatch<\/a>, and also has recently written a book called My Mother\u2019s Money, A Guide to Financial Caregiving, published by Penguin Random House. So Beth has spent her career helping people make better choices and now is kind of dealing with in our own family. So with that, Beth, welcome to the show. Thanks for joining us.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=29.46\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">00:29<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Thanks for having me. I\u2019m glad to be here.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=32.1\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">00:32<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, no, it\u2019s awesome. So would love to just jump in a little bit about your background. I mean in a couple minutes, how you got here and why are you doing this work?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=41.19\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">00:41<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I started working on personal finance out right in the middle of the Great recession. I launched a personal finance website for a OL called Wallet Pop. And before that I was a film critic and entertainment reporter, so it was a big switch for me, but the topics came naturally to me and I was naturally interested in them, and so I just sort of followed the path of what you do when you\u2019re interested in that sort of stuff and ended up getting a CFP and I got the series seven at some point along the way, but you can\u2019t hold that when you\u2019re not at a brokerage. So I don\u2019t currently have that, but I just got really interested in the mechanics of all of this and how it all works together and that works now to inform my journalism and my other writing.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=94.53\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">01:34<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Nice. How long have you had your CFP certification?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=98.79\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">01:38<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Since 2018.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=100.5\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">01:40<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Oh, wow. And have you ever practiced, I mean, did you<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=105.03\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">01:45<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Practice? I have not practiced. I sort of give out general information and help readers. The thing I can do is explain really complex things to people in a way that they can understand. Sometimes the people who understand the numbers and understand the money part of it, can\u2019t explain it in a way that real people can access it. And this book was part of that and the columns that grew out of it, a market watch is the impetus for it was that you can lead people to a checklist, but you can\u2019t make them do the checklist. What\u2019s going to convince them that this stuff is important and that it should be done now rather than sit on their to-do list and never get done. And the idea that 30% of this country has a will and 70% of them do not, and that\u2019s the way that people think of estate planning and they never get to the other documents.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=160.11\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">02:40<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You need a power of attorney or a healthcare proxy or a living will or a trust or any of those things are less prevalent than a will. It\u2019s crazy making for people like us who do this for a living. You really need all those things. So my book was my way of explaining to people through story, my story, my personal story of taking care of my mom and all the things that even though I\u2019m a financial professional, all the things I didn\u2019t know how to do, all the things you learn in books that have no application to real life and you have to navigate your way through this stuff. And my hope is that by telling my story in a way that people can really relate to it would get them to see why things are important and get them to do it. The idea is read this book and you go, oh, now I get it. Now I get why people keep saying I should have a power of attorney. If I don\u2019t have that power of attorney, I\u2019m in deep trouble. And if my mom doesn\u2019t have it and if my sister doesn\u2019t have it and my kids don\u2019t have it, we\u2019re all in a world of pain if something happens. And this writer explained it to me because she went through it and now I don\u2019t have to go through something bad. That\u2019s my hope.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=236.05\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">03:56<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I think hope is good. I would say I feel like, and I\u2019m in this bucket, people can know better. And then there\u2019s the knowing and then there\u2019s the doing. And I think the thing that people have to know is they have to know themselves and how they\u2019re going to act or actually and the self-awareness of what they are actually doing. And yeah, the risk increases over your life. You live longer. It\u2019s like, okay, we\u2019re all headed the same place. It\u2019s more and more every day that goes by. There\u2019s a higher chance something goes sideways and then you\u2019re going to leave a mess for your family. That is really interesting that 70% of people don\u2019t even have a will.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=278.89\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">04:38<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s the national average. The numbers go up the older you get, by the time you get to be 70, the number of 70 year olds who have a will is greater than the number of 30 year olds that have a will, but it\u2019s still not 50% in most cases. And that\u2019s wealthy people and wealthy people. When the brokerage firms, the fancy ones, when they do surveys, they still find that people with greater than a million dollars don\u2019t have a will of any sort or a trust or any other power of attorney documents. You would think that they would know better. They have advisors, they have lawyers, they have people on their team at that wealth level. You have people that help you with those things or access to them at least, and they\u2019re still not doing it.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=328.93\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">05:28<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, it\u2019s so interesting. I think this preamble is opening is kind of highlighting so many of the challenges that are out there. So one explaining things in layman\u2019s terms, right? So people understand it. The industry is still full of jargon, even people who are really know what they\u2019re doing. I was looking at Cody Garrett, he\u2019s doing such good work to educate people. And I looked at his LinkedIn post, he\u2019s like 5 29 72 T, there\u2019s all these stuff. It\u2019s like people have no idea<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=357.09\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">05:57<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>They\u2019re talking about. And when it gets down to a caregiving situation, you can put it in very, very real terms. I\u2019m sitting at my mother\u2019s bedside, she\u2019s got caregivers who need to be paid. How do I write out the check? Where\u2019s money coming from? Who? Who\u2019s account is it coming from and who\u2019s signing the paperwork to give it to the person that you have to pay? That\u2019s just a common situation that we are all going to face at some point. And when I was sitting there next to my mother, I realized I\u2019m like, I know better than this. I know that I was supposed to do all of these things, and yet I\u2019m sitting here with her checkbook next to her in the hospital bed with the caregiver standing right there who needs to be paid. And I don\u2019t know whose name goes on the check. I can\u2019t sign my name, she can\u2019t sign her name. What do we do?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=406.97\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">06:46<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>And if you don\u2019t have it figured out, you\u2019re writing the check out of your own whatever, and then you got to get them, there\u2019s a cash flow. There\u2019s a very pragmatic kind of cashflow thing that has to get set up and created.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=416.33\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">06:56<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>So that\u2019s what I was hoping to highlight for people is these are real situations that come up often in life. There\u2019s no book. There was no book until my book. There was no book for me to look at for how to handle these things. And there\u2019s functional issues and there\u2019s moral issues. Can I forge my mom\u2019s name on this check? She\u2019s sitting right here. She\u2019s telling me I can, does that make it okay? And then there\u2019s emotional stuff that comes into play because all the money I was managing for my mother, spending it or not spending it, eventually it becomes my money. And managing and spending somebody else\u2019s money is a lot different than managing and spending your own money emotionally speaking. It\u2019s just different. It feels weird. There\u2019s guilt attached, there\u2019s childhood recriminations, there\u2019s fights with your siblings. There\u2019s all sorts of stuff that comes into play.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=478.37\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">07:58<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Oh, right, exactly. I thought I was going to bring that up. I think in a lot of families, do you have siblings?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=482.78\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">08:02<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I have a sibling. And we get along and it\u2019s still hard.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=486.83\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">08:06<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, it\u2019s still hard. And it\u2019s like very often people don\u2019t always get along or they have different means and they have different needs and then some people are leaning in and doing it and other people are not doing it. And how do you keep that fair? How do you keep the decision making fair? We\u2019ve had this idea of, I had this idea of maybe there\u2019s needs to be boards, especially as the money gets bigger. So it\u2019s like, hey, you and your sibling plus a third party, independent third party are going to make this decision. So it\u2019s not like one person\u2019s doing things. And<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=515.21\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">08:35<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Sometimes people don\u2019t like their parents either. People don\u2019t have perfect families. And the people I interviewed for the books, I was so surprised. Often I loved my mom and my mom was a great person and we were lucky that way, but it wouldn\u2019t have mattered if she was a horrible person and I hated her. I still would\u2019ve ended up her caretaker. And so many people I talked to in the book had terrible relationships with their parents, and yet you end up in this caregiving role nonetheless, and it\u2019s very hard to say no to it. You can put parameters on it and build your boundaries, but it\u2019s really hard morally and to say no.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=552\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">09:12<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah. Do you have any data on the number of people that get involved in caregiving? Everyone\u2019s living longer.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=561.84\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">09:21<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Oh yeah. A RP does an annual survey and it\u2019s 63 million people currently in the United States who are involved in caregiving duties on a steady basis. And at some point, the other is it 70% of us, each individual, 70% of us will end up with some sort of caretaking need. You have a 70% chance of ending up needing somebody to help you at some point. So this goes both ways. You have to be prepared to take care of somebody else and you have to make your life accessible for somebody to take care of you.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=600.57\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">10:00<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>So there\u2019s like 20% of the US population now 63 million out of 300 something, 30 million US people is involved in caregiving today, and I imagine the number\u2019s probably growing pretty fast.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=614.82\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">10:14<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I actually had to break into the book and update the stats. The book was locked down and a RP came out with that study. They do it every year, and so they updated it and I was like calling the publisher and saying, can I break into the book and update this because the numbers jumped a lot and they let me update it, but it\u2019ll change again next year.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=635.07\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">10:35<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, I mean for sure you have these generations now, it\u2019s much more common that people know someone that\u2019s over 90, over a hundred, and then you could have whatever, four generations alive at once, which is, that\u2019s more common<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=652.02\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">10:52<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Club sandwich generation. Somebody in my work came up with that. You have kids, a parent and a grandparent that you\u2019re taking care of because your parents at that point also need help and they can\u2019t take care of their parents. And so you get stuck with all of them. Your grandparent is a hundred, your parent is 80 and your child is 16.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=675.03\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">11:15<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I think what\u2019s so interesting is that when you raise children, we\u2019re like, okay, we raise our kids till they\u2019re 18 or 21 or now it\u2019s like you support \u2019em until they\u2019re 25 or whatever. We\u2019re extending these time periods of our lives, but there\u2019s kind of an ending point for your kids, but at the same time, you\u2019re going to be inheriting your parents. And that could be 20 years. I mean it probably not, but depends if someone starts needing help in their seventies, which depends on their health situation and they live to mid nineties, that\u2019s 20 years.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=716.35\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">11:56<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah. I speak to a lot of people who are in the, well, a lot of your audiences is sort of do it yourself, people who manage their own finances and they\u2019re very careful with it. You talk to people in the financial independence, retire early movement, they\u2019re very concentrated on and fixated on their own plan like, I\u2019m going to do this and this and my money\u2019s going to grow to this point, and then I can retire and then I\u2019ll live off this income. And if that works for you in a bubble, but you\u2019re connected to other people and if they haven\u2019t taken the same care with their resources, your whole plan gets blown up. You can map out with whatever software you want, you can map it all out for you. But what happens if a parent gets sick, not even your parent, it could be your spouse\u2019s parent, it could be an aunt and uncle and they get sick and then you\u2019re on call.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=777.16\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">12:57<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I think that the thing that would probably interest your audience the most is I go through this whole section in the book. There are four sections in the book and one whole section is on how to make the money last. And you do that for yourself. You plan your retirement, you do all your projections and all of that. And we get letters from readers over and over again. Every permutation of the scenario. My mom just got diagnosed with Alzheimer\u2019s, she has $500,000. How do we most effectively make the money last and pay the least amount of taxes on it, get the most amount of growth, and what do we do if it runs out? That\u2019s the scenario that every single person who talks to us wants to know about. So what do you tell people in that search? What\u2019s your plan for that?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=827.74\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">13:47<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I mean, it\u2019s such a good question. I mean, for sure, we\u2019ve been seeing this need for intergenerational planning and I think what you\u2019re describing with the fire folks, I\u2019ve hung out with the fire folks a lot. It\u2019s great. These people are super intentional, they\u2019re literate and they do all these good things and they do get to financial independence. And yes, it\u2019s way easier if you have no kids. It\u2019s like, yeah, too high income earners, no kids, no problem. We\u2019re good right then. Yeah, your parents, well, whatever, they\u2019re on their own. But yeah, no, you definitely start thinking about your parents as another obligation and it\u2019s real. And most people aren\u2019t making those good choices and they have much tougher situations as we\u2019re talking. It\u2019s like I\u2019m writing this. I\u2019m like, all right, a good practice to have an investment policy statement for your family. You could have a caregiving policy statement.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=870.76\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">14:30<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You know what? We need to think about what we\u2019re signing up for with our kids. You kind of talk to your kids about it. Hey, I have friends. It\u2019s like, guess what? You graduate. We\u2019re going to subsidize your education for a hundred grand and after that you\u2019re on your own. Good luck and don\u2019t come back. And I have friends that have done that nonetheless. They\u2019re my generation. They were told by their parents like, great, we helped you with college, but now don\u2019t plan on moving back in here. You got to make it work. That\u2019s less prevalent now, but with the caregiving, it\u2019s like, okay, here\u2019s what our commitments are and discuss it because you kind know what\u2019s out there and it kind of sneaks up on you and then you\u2019re like, okay, well this is happening to my parents. It\u2019s like, okay, they\u2019re both alive. Yay. They\u2019re both living independently. Yay. And they\u2019ve done that for a long time and they\u2019re pretty healthy, knock on wood. But you can ride it out in your house, but it gets harder. Stairs, bathrooms, all this stairs and bathrooms seem to be coming up in discussions. More single level living comes up. But yeah, what\u2019s the plan? And then different people live longer. What\u2019s the plan if one partner goes away and families are distributed? I mean, if you\u2019re all in the same place, easier, but if you\u2019re not, all these things have to be thought through.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=947.18\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">15:47<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>One person read an early copy of my book and they were like, I didn\u2019t understand. Wait, what are you talking about? This whole thing about one social security. She didn\u2019t understand that you have two people living together and they have two each have their social security. And when one dies, you go down to one social security income and you get to pick the larger of the two if you\u2019re married. But it\u2019s still just one of those two checks, and that\u2019s a huge, if you don\u2019t know that\u2019s coming, that\u2019s a huge whopper,<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=981.89\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">16:21<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Right? Well, that\u2019s the kind of stuff that you can see in our software and you can build scenarios. Or the bigger thing is someone has a monster pension with nose, joint and survivor benefit.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=993.68\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">16:33<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>They\u2019re like, I\u2019m good. I\u2019ve got a great pension. And that\u2019s tied to the husband, but the husband dies first and there\u2019s not a great benefit. Then actually that was a huge income thing, which is quality of life and your wife is hosed, right? Or your spouse is hosed. So yeah, it\u2019s kind of happening now as we speak. I feel like so many families are, and I see this in our business too, there\u2019s people, one of our senior guys right now is back with his parents. We\u2019re in their nineties and I\u2019ve had this happen. There was a guy, he was in his thirties and his parents were in his seventies. He was like, guess what? I\u2019m schlepping him around to medical stuff. I\u2019m sitting in counseling sessions and talking to doctors. You\u2019re thrust into it and it crowds out so much other stuff. And that\u2019s happening for 20% of our population in every business,<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1044.53\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">17:24<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Every business. It\u2019s a huge concern and it\u2019s really hard to off lay some of this stuff. And it\u2019s hardest to lay the financial stuff with my mom. We were able to handle hire caregivers to cover the bathroom needs. I didn\u2019t have to be there every day to help my mom go to the bathroom and shower, but we couldn\u2019t. You can hire people to do the financial management, but some of the financial tasks and decision making, you still need to be the, not even necessarily next of kin, but you have to be a trusted confidant of that person. And these were intimate, irrevocable financial decisions that somebody\u2019s going to make. They\u2019re going to have access to your bank account. They can take money out, and you have to be able to trust them. You need to be able to know that they\u2019re acting in your best interest and you\u2019re not going to sell the house out from under you or away all the money.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1105.05\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">18:25<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>To me, a lot of this is back to how businesses run it. We\u2019ve got 60 people in our company and we have different people with different levels of control, but you have signing authority and there\u2019s certain people that can look at money and there\u2019s certain people that can sign for chime checks, and it\u2019s like some of the stuff that we\u2019re talking about, there are care concierges out there that can help with all this stuff. And so what happens though is you\u2019re like, okay, we haven\u2019t thought about this. Oh, someone falls. Okay, now we\u2019re in it. Okay. And that\u2019s like when our kids were younger, we would joke about, we\u2019re the most expensive Uber drivers, parents are in my day job. I\u2019m a fucking SVP Google, and then I spend two hours a day drive my kids to soccer practice and my time is worth 5,000 or whatever volleyball thousand an hour, but whatever.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1149.84\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">19:09<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s, and you should do that as a parent, but there\u2019s a balance. And now by the way, with Waymo teen mode, you\u2019re going to be able to order robotic cars to drive your kids around. That\u2019s happening. I feel like there are experts out there, and it feels like that\u2019s going to become a huge industry where it\u2019s like, okay, guess what? Call somebody. They have the right level of control. They understand how playbook, how to run the playbook, and they help figure this all out and help you make decisions and whatever. And that\u2019ll be pretty valuable for society. So maybe it\u2019s a workplace benefit. Well,<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1187.19\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">19:47<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, hopefully some help comes along, but then you still end up, at the end of the day, somebody\u2019s got to be the named representative. And I\u2019m going through this now with a friend who\u2019s trying to get the power of attorney in force for his parents. And there\u2019s six different banks involved that he\u2019s got to get this paperwork to, and they\u2019re making him jump through the most extreme hoops in order to be verified to be the representative on the account. And it\u2019s just torture. So you can have a financial advisor telling you what to do, but at the end of the day, you might be making those phone calls. You might be on hold with a bank trying to talk them through why they should accept your document. One, we sent the same documents to all the places and one rejected it. It wasn\u2019t the original. Do we need six fully notarized original copies of the power of attorney? Nobody has that.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1252.99\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">20:52<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s tough because on the one hand, the banks are like, well, you have to know your customer, KYC, anti-money fraud and all that stuff you don\u2019t want. This is such an area where people can come in and be like, yeah, I\u2019m the caregiver. Give me control. And then they drain the account. There\u2019s that. So that\u2019s good. But there\u2019s also banks make lots of money holding your money, and they know that people will move money around and simplify it and rationalize it. And so having friction is fine. Sure. The manager there is getting the phone call. Well, and older people have a lot of money. Oh, they might move 200 grand out of the bank. Well, that\u2019s not really good for me. So I think it\u2019s something to be aware of. Okay, interesting. Yeah. So yeah, in terms of your own story, I\u2019m just curious the story arc in terms of were you planning for this, when did, did the need of arise? How long were you living? Is your mom still alive or does she pass away?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1317.22\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">21:57<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>She passed away for us, the trajectory was very short and very intense. My mom was 76. She was living her own life. She was perfectly happy. She was treasurer of her condo board. She was an active person, but she was having back trouble and she had lifelong back trouble and she went in for a spinal fusion operation to try to maintain her ability to walk. So she called me up, I get that call. So the story starts with me getting that phone call like, Hey, I\u2019m going in for this surgery. Can you come down here? I don\u2019t know how long I\u2019ll be incapacitated, but it\u2019ll be a couple of weeks. So can you come and make sure we have everything set up and take over the reins for me for as long as need be? And so I went down there thinking it would be a couple of days, whatever, she would be fine.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1375.39\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">22:55<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Her brain functioned perfectly and everything would be good. And from there it was just complication after complication after complication. And from November until July, she was just rolling waves of sickness. So I ended up fully taking over all of her financials, the long-term care insurance, the Medicare, the decisions about where she would go and what facility she would be in and how much the caregivers would cost and what we can afford and how would we manage her nest egg through all of that. Then she went home finally on hospice, didn\u2019t make it very much past that and then started the process. The second half of the book is me settling her estate, which is its whole separate ball game that nobody prepares you for, but that all of this stuff is important to do ahead of time so that it\u2019s not so bad when somebody\u2019s trying to settle your estate.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1435.01\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">23:55<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>So I went through, from the time she had surgery to the time I filed her last tax return was just like a little over a year. And so I was able to tell it as a story in the book because some people go through this stuff for decades. If a person in your life has Alzheimer\u2019s or some other dementia disease, it could be regularly 10, 12 years of this. And that would be hard to tell as a story coherently. But mine was just like this. And some people, they get the call and it\u2019s a car accident or a heart attack or something, and it\u2019s just immediate and all of them are bad. There\u2019s no better outcome than one or the other. But mine took about a little over a year and I was the financial caretaker. My brother was the one who dealt with the doctors.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1489.73\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">24:49<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I hated dealing with the doctors. I couldn\u2019t. And so he did that and I did the bills and that was sort of our split of labor. And we had caregivers to do the bathroom and that was how we got through it. But as I was going through it, I started to write about it because my job is I\u2019m a retirement columnist and this is what this is all about. And it just really struck a chord with people. There\u2019s so many people going through this, and it occurred to me that most of what is out there for people is piecemeal. You have a problem, you google it and you get a piece of information and you get them one at a time as you go through it. And nobody ever tells you how all the pieces fit together and why all the pieces fit together and why it all works this way. And so this was my attempt to do that because I felt like there was missing this unified string theory of financial planning.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1557.44\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">25:57<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>No, that\u2019s awesome. Well, and good job going through that whole process and writing it down and sharing it.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1562.54\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">26:02<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Thank you. My mom was very careful with her finances and I felt like I needed to respect that When I was growing up. We got audited three times. My father was a college professor and he would take sabbaticals every couple of years. And so he would take a huge cut in salary and go live somewhere else for a year and he would get a grant and there would be all these expenses. And when we\u2019d come back and my mom would file taxes, then we\u2019d get a letter from the IRS. And this was my whole life. This is why I\u2019m in financial journalism, I think is because my whole life was my mom fighting with the IRS. And this became the underpinning of everything in our household was my dad would go buy a book and my mom would say, do you have a receipt for that? And it would go into the receipt bin for his business expenses. And this is how we lived. I mean, my mom kept track of everything and she never lost an audit. And you try taking care of that person\u2019s finances. Are you going to mess it up? No, I was terrified of it of her<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1639.2\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">27:19<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Had to live up to the standard. Were your parents good investors?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1643.22\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">27:23<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>My parents were terrible investors. We also never had any money. And I go through this in the book too because they were both teachers and all of their money was annuitized and they had no savings. And so the way this impacted me as a caregiver is we need to put our hands on money and fast. And I couldn\u2019t, it was all locked up in annuity contracts because that\u2019s how in 4 0 3 Bs, that\u2019s how the advisors steer you into these products, and teachers are generally conservative and that\u2019s where their money went and that\u2019s where they kept it and they were happy with that situation. My mom was a conservative person and with her money and that that\u2019s what she wanted. She wanted a guaranteed rate on her money. She didn\u2019t want to be worrying about the stock market and that worked for her until she got sick.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1705.29\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">28:25<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>And then how did it play out? I\u2019m just curious on the other side of this for, because obviously it\u2019s 4 0 1 Ks, there\u2019s 4 0 3 Bs is four 50 sevens, and yeah, people invest this way. What happened with your, when did your dad,<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1719.27\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">28:39<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>My dad died in 2018 and they didn\u2019t have very much before he died. And the nest egg that they ended up having was from death benefits after he died. So the majority of my mother\u2019s money came after my father died.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1735.47\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">28:55<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Your dad had an annuity.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1737.05\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">28:57<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>My dad had annuity that had a death benefit rider that I will say this about, that advisor that helped him with all of this who really cared and was a good guy. I\u2019m not saying anything negative about that. He got some sort of death benefit attached to my dad\u2019s annuity product. That was a phenomenal death benefit and really secured my mom\u2019s financial future. It wasn\u2019t life insurance because my dad also had a nice life insurance policy, but these things really helped my mother. They allowed her financial flexibility and freedom.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1775.86\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">29:35<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>So your father\u2019s income ends, but there\u2019s a death benefit so that a pile of money and I guess was that tax free?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1785.04\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">29:45<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>That was tax free? It was pre-tax money. It was an IRA. It was, this is complex stuff I go into in the book. It was an annuity, but it was not annuitized, so she had to take RMDs from it as if it were an IRA.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1799.68\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">29:59<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>So your father died but he had not started annuitizing. So he had been saving money in this vehicle, but there was a value to the vehicle?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1808.71\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">30:08<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yes. So there was a value created, there\u2019s a value created for RMD purposes. At the end of the year there\u2019s a net present value of the annuity contract and RMD is based on that. And so by the end of the year you have to take the RMD out, but the money was not annuitized. And since my mom\u2019s illness fell right in this five year contract period after my father died, the money goes into a contract for my mom. She kept it in a similar contract but a new one in her name. And because we hadn\u2019t reached five years yet, if we started breaking into it and taking money out beyond the rmd, then there were going to be, she was going to lose value on the contract and the advisor was trying to prevent us from losing any principal value by breaking into it a couple months early.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1861.99\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">31:01<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>But my mom was dying. I\u2019m like, we need this money now. We have to pay Gary. It\u2019s July. I have money for the next two months, and then you\u2019re telling me I have to wait till October, but I can\u2019t wait till October. The caregivers cost $15,000. I need $15,000. And so we went back and forth a couple of times and then my mom just got too sick and Jen ended up passing away before her cash on hand ran out. That was just our particular situation. If she had lasted, Jimmy Carter lasted a year or more in hospice. If my mom had rebounded a little bit or had even lasted six months, we would have needed to break into that money and we would have, it would\u2019ve been worth the penalty to not have to take it to my account. I would\u2019ve had to liquidate stuff in order to cover that amount of cash. I don\u2019t have 15,000 sitting around.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1924.63\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">32:04<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Right. Okay. So I\u2019m just super curious how this unfolded. So your parents working and saving, they\u2019re building value in these vehicles that are a little bit not liquid, and then money flows to your mom. Sorry to dive into these a little. And then she\u2019s subject to RMDs, and I know there\u2019s rules about RMDs, like inherited IRAs. By the way. Our software does help people think about all this stuff and see all that stuff. Then she\u2019s getting sick and then there\u2019s her own annuity situation and then that\u2019s all ultimately making its way to you. And I would say net. Do you feel satisfied like, oh, my parents worked hard. They saved, they didn\u2019t live as long as they might like to enjoy the money, but thankfully we get our family\u2019s going to inherit that money. Is that<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=1971.8\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">32:51<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s a lot more guilty than that. I go into this in the book too. I\u2019m real open about it. No, I feel guilty about that. My mother had that money for her own care. It wasn\u2019t intended for gifting. It was just enough to take care of her until her nineties. If she had lived any longer, that would\u2019ve been a sufficient amount and we wouldn\u2019t have had to worry and she wouldn\u2019t have had to struggle and she would\u2019ve maintained her standard of living and she was 76, which is young to lose somebody these days. And my father was five years older than her. He also died at 76. So both my parents died young and it\u2019s really hard. I don\u2019t know, it\u2019s hard for me to fathom inheriting money in that situation. I\u2019d much rather have them. So I\u2019m still in that mindset of the money still almost, I don\u2019t know want to say it feels dirty, but I can\u2019t look at that money without feeling lost.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2031.08\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">33:51<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>And so that\u2019s why, I mean, I titled the book the way I did because my mother\u2019s money becomes my money at some point and it\u2019s not easy, any of it. And sometimes people get into, I\u2019ve heard about family fines, I wrote about some of them in the book and one sibling wants to keep mom at home, but that\u2019s the more expensive option. And one sibling wants to put, mom frees up the assets in a trust and put mom on Medicare Medicaid and put her in a nursing home and the one sibling is accusing the other of wanting just to take the money. So you go through all this, am I being frugal in order to inherit more or am I being frugal because that\u2019s the right thing to do.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2085.59\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">34:45<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s very complex when you have to, we\u2019re used to money decisions being rational. Your software computes numbers. It doesn\u2019t compute emotions. And what I found is I have all this financial training and I know how to do the equations, but the equations in real life are often not what\u2019s the best scenario? I have three options the computer can tell me, which is cheapest, but the computer can\u2019t tell me which is the best moral option, which is the best. And most of the time all the options are bad. There is no best option. They all suck.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2131.49\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">35:31<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Well, if so, it\u2019s like we\u2019re moving from this. For some people, this world of this didn\u2019t used to be a problem. You\u2019re kind of like a hundred years ago you worked and then you died and then there wasn\u2019t a lot left and your kids were kind of scraping by and whatever. There wasn\u2019t a lot of caregiving because people just didn\u2019t live long. Social security, Medicare, all this stuff was designed for people to live like to 65.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2155.98\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">35:55<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>There wasn\u2019t a lot of legal rigmarole after somebody died, either closing out somebody\u2019s life and turning out the lights wasn\u2019t that hard. Years ago<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2167.68\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">36:07<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It wasn\u2019t complex, but now where there\u2019s 80 trillion piled up by people like your parents, good for them. And so on the one hand it\u2019s like, okay, a lot of that could be used for their, hopefully will be used for their caregiving. I think also people, there\u2019s this whole other thing of how do you want to live? There\u2019s this whole dial with zero. A lot of our users are going to have all their money, their maximum wealth in their nineties. Well, for a lot of folks it\u2019s like actually use the money, enjoy yourself, really value your human capital. I think this is Azu Wells who\u2019s one of our top folks that we work with partners, and he talks about this. He\u2019s like, by 65, 68, there\u2019s this massive chance you\u2019re going to, as a male especially, you\u2019re going to have this medical thing that\u2019s going to prohibit you from really fully embracing your life.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2220.15\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">37:00<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>And so you need to be not thinking 90, you need to be thinking depending on your health, use your time and spend your money. But now we have this problem or good problem, but really complex problem of with all these dynamics of a big pile of money, siblings that think differently, parents that have different levels of healthcare, and how do we make this easy and not to complicated, help people look into their future, their parents\u2019 future and their own future and make these decisions about how they want to live their lives. Right before it just happened for them, which is what happens. It\u2019s like it happened. I got the phone call. Here it is now, deal with it.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2262.03\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">37:42<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, it\u2019s a problem that doesn\u2019t lend itself to spreadsheets, that sort of thing. That\u2019s a family conversation that\u2019s about your values and what you hold important. And that\u2019s part of money too.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2277.9\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">37:57<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah. Well, this is where I think financial advice and coaching is going. The basic blocking and tackling of trading and portfolio management, that\u2019s commoditized, right?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2291.46\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">38:11<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2292.21\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">38:12<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The job is help people see where they\u2019re today, what\u2019s likely to happen, think about it in advance, pre-negotiate this kind of stuff so that there\u2019s way less conflict and way more alignment and prep it all up so it\u2019s lower friction and just make those choices be much more intentional with human capital and your money. Another big thing that\u2019s happening with millennials is they\u2019re pressing mom and dad for Give me money for the down payment, probably Gen Z too, which is fair. Don\u2019t take it all with you. Why not help your, we\u2019re having your, we\u2019re having kids, you have grandchildren, and we could have a better life if we could buy a house now, right?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2338.78\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">38:58<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah. I\u2019m working on a story right now on whether people should consider as part of their retirement decision making process, if they should work till their kids are 26 to keep them on their health plan. Should that be part of your retirement decision? Because<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2357.92\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">39:17<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m sure it\u2019s for my<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2358.73\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">39:18<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>People. I think about that all the time because the way the age that people have kids now you\u2019re bumping up against that<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2366.53\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">39:26<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>For sure.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2368.09\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">39:28<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>It didn\u2019t occur to my parents. First of all. There was no mandate for 26 back then and they had kids young. I had kids older. And so if I want to think about retiring at 26, it means they have to be launched enough to have their own health plans. And I don\u2019t know that society is set up for them to be that launched by that age. Well, it\u2019s<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2396.13\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">39:56<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Changing. Yeah, for sure. I mean, there\u2019s so much data about kids boomeranging now. A huge percentage of adult children move back in the house at some point, and I think many of us experience that. I definitely think about this. I want to keep the house we raised our kids in so that we can be kind of like a home base for people if necessary. But that comes with costs and everything else versus downsizing and stuff. I mean, we still have kids in high school and stuff like that. So for your own life, I\u2019m just curious, did your inheritance change your life and your perspective on your own work and how you think about your life?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2433.37\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">40:33<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>No. I mean the inheritance was not life-changing sort of situation, but the lessons I learned from it did hit home all those points about live the life you want to live and do the things that you want to do sooner rather than later. I mean, the fact that that bubble, both my parents died at 76, that\u2019s not that far away for me, and that really is terrifying, to be honest with you. I want more time than that. So right now I have the same back condition that my mother had and right now I\u2019m like, my prevailing thing is I don\u2019t want to end off in the same health condition as she did. I need to be healthier than that so that I can enjoy my life and the health part of that. It\u2019s not about money for that, it\u2019s about lifestyle. And so I really focused on that.<\/p>\n<p><strong>(<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2491.36\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">41:31<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>But also my parents, I will say this, they both died at 76, but they lived the hell out of their lives. They did not exactly what they wanted to do and made no compromises to anybody. Anybody who knew, my father knew that he did not care about what anybody thought and just did exactly what he wanted to do and pursued his own intellectual pursuits was that sounds wild. But he liked to read books about literary theory. He wasn\u2019t going off on mountain climbing or anything like that, but he never had answered anybody and he never had to do anything he didn\u2019t want to do. And to me that was the greatest lesson in life. I want to live like that.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2535.53\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">42:15<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, that\u2019s awesome. I, our human capital is our scarcest resource and we control it and yet we treat it as the least valuable asset. I think for many of us do. I mean, look, we\u2019re investing it. I think most people kind of live their life. They\u2019re trying to take care of other people, their kids, their parents, and then be smart about their own stuff. But yeah, I appreciate that you appreciate the importance of lifestyle and healthcare and health span. I think a lot of people really trying to emphasize that we have to invest in ourselves, work out, eat healthy, all that, try not to have heart attacks and heal over.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2573.33\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">42:53<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I don\u2019t want to give away the end of the book, but the conclusion I come to is that any money, my mom liked us to be happy. My mom liked to give us treats, whether they were, she was a baker and a cook, and so some of the treats were food related, but she liked to treat us and do nice things. And so the money that I have from both my parents, I call bubby money bubby is Yiddish for grandmother. Anytime that we do something a little bit extra, we call that, I\u2019m like, don\u2019t worry about the cost. It\u2019s bubby money. So I buy a pair of shoes that\u2019s more expensive than I would normally buy. That\u2019s bubby money. Sending the kids to college is bub money. Anything that makes anything we do that makes somebody smile, that\u2019s bubby money.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2626.82\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">43:46<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s awesome.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2627.72\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">43:47<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2627.96\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">43:47<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Well, I think that your parents would want that for you and their grandchildren, right? Your children, so that\u2019s a good thing. I think they\u2019d be psyched that that\u2019s their hard work resulted in this and hopefully, and it sounds like your family appreciates it, which is good too. I think that\u2019s another big thing is people need to understand their family histories and the sacrifices that people make to don\u2019t take it for granted. And by the way, just one comment. It feels like there\u2019s so much data in here, but this big wealth transfer, it\u2019s really concentrated at the higher end. It\u2019s like, no, there\u2019s a amount of money. Well, certain people are going to inherit a ton of it and their trust fund kids, this trust fund idea is going to become a bigger thing, and then you\u2019re going to see more trust fund kids and then there\u2019s a bunch of people, or it\u2019ll be your situation where it\u2019s like, okay, it\u2019s helpful, but it sounds like it\u2019s not nothing. If it\u2019s helping with education and stuff like that, it makes a difference.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2683.14\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">44:43<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I was already living the life I wanted to live anyway, so I don\u2019t need to change anything because I was already doing what I wanted to be doing, but that was already the lesson my parents had given me anyway. I grew up in a household where people were led to do the things they wanted to do, and so I didn\u2019t have to cut loose and go crazy because I was already doing exactly what I wanted to do<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2711.01\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">45:11<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Already living the dream. That\u2019s good. If you were to step back and say, okay, what are some practical things that people should consider or do like now?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2724.84\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">45:24<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Make sure everybody you care about, including yourself as a power of attorney and a healthcare proxy, really easy to do. Make sure that your phone has a legacy contact named so that somebody can get into your phone and make sure that you have some sort of plan for all of your stuff. If you die, something will a trust.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2748.06\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">45:48<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Oh, will all the estate plan stuff.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2751.57\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">45:51<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>If you have a house, that house needs a plan. A house doesn\u2019t necessarily need a will or a trust, but it needs a beneficiary deed or whatever. Your state allows you to have homestead exemption, whatever that is. All of your bank accounts need beneficiaries. You want to avoid probate as much as possible and pass the assets seamlessly so that people don\u2019t get stuck with them. I talked to a guy for my book who, financial professional tax expert, his mom died, she passed the house to him at a will and it took a year for him to get the clearance to sell the house, so he\u2019s sitting on that house for a year paying all the bills on it before he can put it on the market. That\u2019s a problem you\u2019re sticking somebody with. Don\u2019t stick somebody with that problem.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2803.59\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">46:43<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Are there any services that you used, and I mean, I know the guys at Trust and Will. There\u2019s all these different estate planning tools that are out there. Did you find things that were useful?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2814.78\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">46:54<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I have resources in my book. I don\u2019t like to name specific ones just because I\u2019m a journalist and we don\u2019t endorse anything. There\u2019s plenty of help out there. There\u2019s lawyers you can find, there\u2019s financial advisors. I send people generally to the professional organizations for these things like the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.naela.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys<\/a>, which is NLA org or NAPFA for fee only. Financial planners or even the Ccfp board. You want a fee only, hopefully an hourly rate instead of 1% of all your assets, but you\u2019re going to end up needing a lawyer. Somebody along the way is going to need a lawyer at some point. Financial advisor\u2019s help. A lot of this you can do on a lot of the financial stuff you can do on your own.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2869.39\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">47:49<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Did you do most of it yourself or did you have an outside advisor helping you?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2873.01\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">47:53<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I did it all myself.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2874.43\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">47:54<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>You did it all yourself? Yeah.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2876.26\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">47:56<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The key question for my mom was just managing, just making sure that the money would last and I have a financial calculator. I know how to use it. I would say that that is the number one thing that gave me peace of mind is being able to run those numbers. And I know you guys have a way of doing that. I give away in the book to run those numbers, not addition and subtraction. It\u2019s way more complicated than that, and you need some kind of calculator that can run multiple scenarios and do growth at the same time. You\u2019re taking out money is the thing. I always knew that she would be fine. I always knew that there would be enough money, so I didn\u2019t panic. She panicked. She was like, this is costing so much money, we can\u2019t afford this. I\u2019m like, wait, you know what? We can\u2019t afford this and you\u2019re okay.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2931.25\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">48:51<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I think so many people need to hear that message. They can\u2019t appreciate it. It\u2019s hard for them.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2935.66\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">48:55<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, it\u2019s really hard. And when it comes, people don\u2019t like to sell houses or cars or anything like that, but when your loved one is at the point where they need to go into a facility and they\u2019re not coming back out, you can sell the house.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=2948.02\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">49:08<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Yeah, a hundred percent. Okay. Well this is great, Beth. This is super helpful. I think this story will resonate. It\u2019s actually hearing it. It\u2019s awesome to hear it in your words and kind of what you went through, and hopefully people, I think absorb the lesson and then also get the level of support they need. I mean, I think on our side, we see this problem. We see intergenerational planning happen happening. We also know that some people are DIY. Some people need coaching and support, and some people just want to outsource it. So we\u2019re trying to think about and head in this direction of being able to offer people this level of support. And I think the important thing is people themselves need to recognize themselves. Like myself, I know there there\u2019s always things, I\u2019m always learning and there\u2019s things that I do, and then there\u2019s things that haven\u2019t happened and should happen and I\u2019m in this space, and so the data that you shared, 70% of people don\u2019t have wills, and then the more advanced POA, all this other stuff, like people aren\u2019t there and they need to get there. It\u2019s a huge opportunity for the industry in general. Any final thoughts for the audience out here?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=3026.96\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">50:26<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I answer questions on my website, so if there\u2019s anything else you want to ask, it\u2019s beth pinsker.com and you can submit a question and I will either answer them on the website or in my <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marketwatch.com\/author\/beth-pinsker?gaa_at=eafs&amp;gaa_n=ASWzDAieDMrALSXliEhOG0sSs1qpEz1kag4Ep6P9qhkHK2POk_YnbsIHgAoOg3b2uyg%3D&amp;gaa_ts=68e0211f&amp;gaa_sig=L3g3LdHMNT9M6zpQL3W20DrA3s6UulhlcVC-syiOhoxy1UzzWbQWf6wJSzTYM7Ujxfo6enCDgofq5R6fWxZ0vA%3D%3D\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">MarketWatch<\/a> column, and I\u2019m hoping I\u2019m an ongoing dialogue with people and help people as they find the book and find me to be able to guide them to the right places.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Steve Chen (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=3051.77\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">50:51<\/a>):<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Okay, maybe you should go on YouTube and become a YouTube. That\u2019s not for me. I don\u2019t need that infrastructure. You\u2019d be surprised at, I meet so many people that have interesting things to say and then they get they\u2019re authentic people and sharing their stories and that builds trust and credibility. But alright, well, Beth, thanks for joining us. This was great. And for everyone listening, definitely beth pinsker.com. You can also, we\u2019ll put a link to her book, my Mother\u2019s Money, A Guide to Financial Caregiving, and all reviews of this are welcome also, hopefully you check out Beth\u2019s work at <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marketwatch.com\/author\/beth-pinsker?gaa_at=eafs&amp;gaa_n=ASWzDAieDMrALSXliEhOG0sSs1qpEz1kag4Ep6P9qhkHK2POk_YnbsIHgAoOg3b2uyg%3D&amp;gaa_ts=68e0211f&amp;gaa_sig=L3g3LdHMNT9M6zpQL3W20DrA3s6UulhlcVC-syiOhoxy1UzzWbQWf6wJSzTYM7Ujxfo6enCDgofq5R6fWxZ0vA%3D%3D\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">MarketWatch<\/a> as well. So with that, thanks for listening and Beth, thanks very much for joining and sharing your story.<\/p>\n<p>Beth Pinsker (<a href=\"https:\/\/www.rev.com\/app\/transcript\/NjhkZDljZjYyN2I5ZWJiYjE2MzM3ZmIwVnd1RU1wZXVTQUFa\/o\/VEMwNzk3NTE3Mjgy?ts=3098.24\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">51:38<\/a>):<\/p>\n<p>Thank you.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/www.instagram.com\/embed.js\"><\/script><br \/>\n<br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.boldin.com\/retirement\/podcast-101-caring-for-parents-planning-for-the-future-with-beth-pinsker\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Source link <\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Beth Pinsker CFP\u00ae, MarketWatch columnist, and author of My Mother\u2019s Money explains how caring for her mom exposed the gap between \u201cknowing\u201d and \u201cdoing\u201d estate\/care plans. Only ~30% have wills; even fewer have POAs\/health proxies, creating real cash-flow and authorization crises when care starts. She describes the emotional and ethical knots (siblings, guilt) and how<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":21644,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"rank_math_lock_modified_date":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[348],"tags":[130,8476,718,1012,8477,940,3149],"class_list":{"0":"post-21642","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-retirement","8":"tag-beth","9":"tag-caring","10":"tag-future","11":"tag-parents","12":"tag-pinsker","13":"tag-planning","14":"tag-podcast"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21642","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=21642"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21642\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/21644"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=21642"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=21642"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/finderica.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=21642"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}